OFF THE HILL

Minnesotans Reassure Premature Winter that “This Happens to a Lot of Seasons”

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MINNESOTA—Reflecting on this summer’s frustratingly brief hint of hot weather before the unexpected coming of the winter months, Minnesotans have assured the midwestern climate that this does, in fact, happen to a lot of seasons.

Regional National Weather System analyst Caroline Sorel, in a phone interview conducted Friday morning after the winter weather departed for the day, traced the cause of winter’s premature escalation to stress from “a lot of the changes the climate is currently dealing with.” Sorel added, “I’ve seen a ton of seasons do this. I think they just get a little too excited and blow in before we get fully prepared. It’s fine, though, and totally normal.”

“Unexpected blanketing often catches Minnesotans off guard. Fortunately this time was more of a ‘dry run’ as I like to call it,” continued Sorel. “It would be refreshing not to have to deal with a big mess every time the climate captures our attention, as it can sometimes be frustrating to those who were expecting it to hold off a little bit longer. I mean, we didn’t even have time to get the leaves off the trees.”

Sorel did go on to warn people of the hazards that can be caused by such surprise affection, “While this has occurred many times before, I would advise Minnesotans to take adequate precautions. If the season hasn’t changed in a while, even putting on the long sleeves or ‘special occasion hats’ can cause winter to jump the gun. I was not at all prepared when I left the house this morning and got some snow in my eye.”

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