CAMPUS NEWS

Football Team Predicted to Win, Lose, or Tie Game Tomorrow

MENOMONIE, WI- As the GAC Football team prepares for their game against UW-Stout tomorrow, you might be wondering: will they win? Our sports analysts have been consulted and their conclusion: we really don’t know, please don’t ask us.

 

We do have some sure bets on the game tomorrow. One is that unless some horrible predicament happens, the game will, in fact, be played. The ball will be kicked, caught, and thrown. Men will be sweaty. Beyond that, we have no idea.

 

Look, maybe the question isn’t whether or not Gustavus will win, but do we care? And the answer is, in our case, not really. We’ll probably have better things going on at that point, like watching Division 1 football or see what’s happening on the internet. So, Gustavus, our prediction for the game is that, in the long run, it won’t affect our lives too much. And that’s an okay thought to have.

 

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