Happy sixth day of Halloween, Fourth Crown readers! We at The Fourth Crown have been delighting ourselves with this festive occasion, snorting pumpkin spice off of skeletons and getting the shit scared out of us with horror movies. But with this celebration, we have noticed a lack of halloween spirit around campus. The movie nights in the Arb barely feature our lovable spooky flicks, and this place isn’t nearly as haunted as it appears to be. With a campus that was established in the 1800s, you would think you’d see a spectre in every room! This appears to be a severe lack of diversity between the living and the dead on campus. This halloween season, make it your goal to invite charming spirits to the college and welcome this long ignored crowd.
“Being assigned a haunted apartment was probably the best thing that could have happened for me this school year,” says senior poli-sci major Gabriel Vortez. “When I moved in, I didn’t expect to have former Minnesota governor Henry A. Swift as a bonus roommate, but he’s been more helpful than I expected.” Vortez has always been known for having good grades, but since he’s had the help from the third governor of Minnesota, his essays have become something you would find in high level governmental discourses. In exchange for the help with his homework, Vortez allows the spirit free access to his body, allowing Swift to possess his mortal form. This goes to show that having a larger ghostly presence on campus and striking deals with them would benefit the community.
Having places become haunted is a fairly easy thing to do, and lord knows that there’s a long history on this land that would supply plenty of pissed off spectres. If you would like to invite your own Casper-pal into your shared living space, try facing two mirrors across from each other. This will open something of a spiritual gateway for the spirits (*cough* or demons *ahem*) that are trying to reach our living realm. You can also sweeten the pot by playing with a ouija board with a group of friends! These two methods are the best, guilt-free options you have for creating a haunting.
“Before trying to get your dorm haunted, just know that the Gustavus Chaplain’s Office does not provide exorcism services,” unnecessarily-warns Chaplain Maggie Falenschek. “If you get possessed, your professors are not likely to take that as an excuse for missing class. And can you please try to not to get the Catholics involved with this? If necessary, we can get in touch with a spiritualist that performs banishment rituals.”
With 25 days left of Halloween, it’s important to take advantage of every moment and turn something dull (like a half-decorated Co-Ed dorm room) into something hauntingly beautiful. Get in touch with the roots of this place and form new connections that defy the logic of death!
Categories: CAMPUS NEWS