Forget Overheard at Gustavus, YikYak is the new GAC Internet Cesspool

ST. PETER, MN—Move over Overheard at Gustavus, there’s a new place for Gusties to share their unchecked opinions for all their peers to see. And this time? It’s anonymous. The mobile app YikYak has taken the Gustavus student body by storm, allowing them to share any thought that enters their little pea brains without the worry of having their names attached. 

For those of you readers who either live under a rock or just like…don’t have Facebook, Overheard at Gustavus began as a funny Facebook group for students to share the juicy, silly tidbits they heard in passing all around campus. However, as the group continued to grow, it devolved into a cesspool of bad political takes, virtue signaling, and, occasionally, photos of someone’s lost Airpods or bike. Choir kids battled hockey players from behind keyboards, alumni opened and reopened and reopened the yearbook, and, in the darkest of times, students trapped in multi-level marketing schemes tried to push Herbalife or maybe Monat onto their fellow students. “I literally got migraines from some of the stuff people posted” shared senior Communication Studies major Muriel Davids, “I miss people just posting about the bad hookup they overheard in the library, now it’s just fighting and shit posting” 

Don’t be discouraged by the bleakness of Overheard at Gustavus, for from the ashes rises a new flaming internet phoenix, YikYak. The app operates on location, where a person can see anonymous posts in a forum from anyone within a five-mile radius. Gusties all grouped together on campus can share their unfiltered thoughts, no matter how horny or intoxicated. Best of all, each post can be down or upvoted, meaning, if your stupid ass posts something not even a little bit funny and everyone hates it, THEY’LL LET YOU KNOW! 

“I have a real love-hate relationship with YikYak. Some people post really funny stuff, but sometimes it’s just first years bragging about getting drunk on a Tuesday because their chemistry seminar is too hard” stated sophomore Junie July. 

YikYak is not immune to the depravity that ate away Overheard at Gustavus, but at least the Alumni don’t get to participate.

Categories: CAMPUS NEWS