ST. PETER, MN — For decades, Gusties around campus have been witness to the strange creature we all know and “love;” Gus the Lion. When released, the feline mascot can often be […]
The Dark Truth Behind Gus the Lion and his Handlers
How to Apply for a Scholarship When You’re Painfully Mediocre
ST. PETER, MN – The time is upon us, Gusties, when every other email is an “exciting scholarship opportunity” sent to you by a professor whom you’re not absolutely certain exists outside […]
All of Campus Now Prairie in Progress As Grounds-keeping Staff Vacation
ST. PETER, MN — Gusties wandering the Gustavus campus during the past few weeks may have noticed that the areas designated “Prairie in Progress” have dramatically expanded. This vegetative change has come […]
Campus Safety Reports Quirked up White Boy Seen Busting it Down Sexual Style
ST. PETER, MN — Campus tensions are at an all-time high this week as Campus Safety officers have come out with a shocking statement: a quirked up white boy with a little […]
Pres. Bergman Deploys ROTC Students Following Arbor View Independence Vote
ST. PETER, MN — In a landmark vote held earlier this week, Arbor View CFs have elected to declare independence from Gustavus. In doing so, the two Arbor View buildings have become […]
Opinion: STOP SENDING US FUCKING EMAILS
ST. PETER, MN — Alright. You want us to say it? Need to see our screaming thoughts printed out in a headline? Well here it is, readers. The Fourth Crown collectively has […]
Nordic Ski Team Wins Tournament, Alerts Campus to its Presence
ST. PETER, MN — Gustavus is a world-renowned institution not only for academics but also for top-notch athletics. Home to a myriad of varsity sports, Gustavus has long supported and provided for […]
Report: 100 Hour Challenge Not Enough to Save Your Liver
ST. PETER, MN – After another year of perpetual intoxication, Gusties celebrated the 100 Hour Challenge last weekend. Each year, Gustavus students pretend they are not alcoholics by pledging to refrain from […]
5 Tips for Cultivating a Sexy Atmosphere so your Hookup Forgets You’re in a Dorm Room
ST. PETER, MN – College is a time for romantic experimentation and exploration, with students across campus taking advantage of the accessible community of young single people. However, we can all admit […]
Fourth Crown Tutorials: How To Blend In At Your Super Bowl Party
ST. PETER, MN – Football can be a bit tricky to talk about, especially if you only pretend to care about it once a year. But whether you’ll be spending Super Bowl […]
The Fourth Crown 