The Fourth Crown

Make Your News Count.

Saturday, April 10th, 2021

Menu

  • HOME
  • CAMPUS NEWS
  • OFF THE HILL
  • LIFE & STYLE
  • SPORTS
  • FEATURES
  • NEWS TEAM
  • JOIN US.

Lund Renovation Still Happening

By fourthcrown on March 18, 2020

Opinion: “Fuck”

By fourthcrown on March 17, 2020

Tinder Hookup Becomes Latest Cancellation Due to Coronavirus

By fourthcrown on March 13, 2020

Lund Renovation to Hopefully Include Some Damn Febreze

By fourthcrown on March 5, 2020

Henati Club Inaugural Meeting This Friday Night

By fourthcrown on March 4, 2020

Gordon Ramsay Rates Caf Food

By fourthcrown on February 28, 2020

Five Ways to Fuck With the System

By fourthcrown on November 14, 2019

1: Don’t actually make a list of ways to fuck with the system.

Bored Gus Bus Driver Caught Doing Donuts in Parking Lot

By fourthcrown on November 10, 2019

SAINT PETER, MN- Saturday night, Senior Casey Enblat reported witnessing the Gus Bus spinning mad donuts in the Co-ed parking lot as she waited for a ride. It was an unusually slow […]

Nemo On The Run After Campus Saftey Busts Meth Empire

By fourthcrown on November 7, 2019

SAINT PETER, MN: Nemo, the beloved campus cat, has been a rare creature these past few weeks with many wondering where our fluffy boy went. Campus Saftey has recently made the public […]

GAC Parking Spaces Officially More Valuable than Gold

By fourthcrown on November 4, 2019

“I literally sold my kidney for a parking space last week,” said Sophomore Kristine Wilson, in reference to the newly emerged parking space black market. “A first-row spot in the plex parking […]

Fourth Crown Reviews: Spirit Halloween

By fourthcrown on October 23, 2019

SAINT PETER, MN— Spirit Halloween, a trademark piece of Spooky Season iconography. The yellow, black, and orange banner stands as a comforting symbol splashed over the faint remnants of a long since […]

10 Ways to Scare Off Prospective Students

By fourthcrown on October 18, 2019

SAINT PETER, MN- Tired of dodging high schoolers left and right? Here’s how to make sure you never have to see any of them again.   Tell them about the annual Gustavus […]

The Fourth Crown Reviews: Co-ed

By fourthcrown on October 3, 2019

ST PETER MN- Homecoming weekend has come and gone, and the campus was subjected to the fanfare of Gusties from years past returning to campus and refusing to close their yearbooks. We […]

Cool Professor Replaces Participation Grade With Vibe Checks

By fourthcrown on September 30, 2019

SAINT PETER, MN— A freshly tenured, cool boy Professor made a stir at Gustavus this week by annoying he would be removing the participation grade from his class grade breakdown. Thrilled by […]

5 Tips On How To Prevent Pumpkin Smashers This Halloween

By fourthcrown on September 28, 2019

ST PETER, MN – With October right around the corner, more and more St. Peter families are starting to get into the Halloween spirit and are planning on how they’re really going […]

7 GAC-Inspired Halloween Costumes

By fourthcrown on September 26, 2019

SAINT PETER, MN- As Halloween approaches, you don’t need to look far for inspiration. Here’s some GAC-inspired Halloween costume ideas.  Gus the Lions Captive Mother– Why not dress like Gus’s mother, a […]

Posts navigation

‹ Newer 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 … 62 Older ›

Like Us on Facebook.

Like Us on Facebook.

Popular on The Fourth Crown

  • St. Olaf College Recognized as Worst Academic Institution in Northfield, MN
    St. Olaf College Recognized as Worst Academic Institution in Northfield, MN
  • The Lord of Darkness Reviews Christian Evangelist Magician Tom Coverly
    The Lord of Darkness Reviews Christian Evangelist Magician Tom Coverly
  • 6 Alternatives to the Basic "U up?" Text
    6 Alternatives to the Basic "U up?" Text

Looking for more quality news?

Check out 'The Madison Misnomer,' UW-Madison's premiere source of collegiate, regional, and national news. www.themadisonmisnomer.com www.facebook.com/TheMadisonMisnomer

#MakeYourNewsCount

My Tweets

  • 633,090 hits.

Top Posts

  • St. Olaf College Recognized as Worst Academic Institution in Northfield, MN
  • The Lord of Darkness Reviews Christian Evangelist Magician Tom Coverly
  • 6 Alternatives to the Basic "U up?" Text

Categories

  • ARCHIVE (1)
  • CAMPUS NEWS (505)
  • COMMENTARY (9)
  • FEATURED SERIES (20)
  • LIFE & STYLE (28)
  • OFF THE HILL (96)
  • ORIENTATION (11)
  • SPORTS (19)

Welcome to The Fourth Crown.

The content of this site is satirical in nature and in no way reflects the views of Gustavus Adolphus College or its faculty, students, or administrators. The Fourth Crown is not intended for readers under the age of 18.
  • Top categories: CAMPUS NEWS Gustavus
Blog at WordPress.com. |
Cancel

 
Loading Comments...
Comment
    ×
    Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
    To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy