ST. PETER, MN — In response to an error in cafeteria supply chain communication, it has recently been announced that the cafeteria will be selling only meat and meat by-products, effective immediately. […]
Caf to Exclusively Sell Meat Products In Response to Supply Chain Error
Registration Woes Mount as MyGustavus Demands Answers to its Riddles Three
ST. PETER, MN — As registration season descended upon Gustavus this week, anxiety levels ran high. Following the debacle of room selection, in which at least four hundred students were assigned to […]
Music Building Demolished for Parts to Build Lund Renovation
ST. PETER, MN — In the early morning hours of Thursday, April 21st, residents of Swest and Prairie View looked on in abject terror as both the Schaefer Fine Arts Center and […]
Large Rat Released as New Campus Cat – Nebo!
ST. PETER, MN — Students returning from the long weekend this past Monday were shocked and elated to encounter Nemo’s long-awaited replacement roaming the campus grounds. The new furry friend, coined “Nebo” […]
Brave Student Embarks on Journey to End of Ring Road
ST. PETER, MN– Throughout the world, Gustavus is well-known as an institution constantly making groundbreaking and world-changing breakthroughs in a variety of fields. Gusties have grown to pride themselves on making these […]
Jesus Has Risen — Says, “Pay Your Taxes”
SALT LAKE CITY, UT – A miracle happened this last Sunday. Shocking people who thought that they wouldn’t witness this in their lifetime, the son of God has thrown a surprise resurrection. […]
Half of Your Tuition Cost Paying for Caf’s Easter Decor
ST. PETER, MN — With Gusties excitedly preparing to spend their single day of Easter Break getting blackout drunk, the Caf’s efforts to stoke the holiday spirit have not gone unnoticed. From […]
Res Life to Require Medical Accommodations for Indoor Housing Fall 2022
The most soul-sucking, heart-wrenching, wretchedly foul, indescribably horrid time of the year is upon us: housing selection. Gustavus is notorious not only for its lack of humane housing options but also for […]
Kappas, SAE, and Eppies Merge Into Super Frat — Epsilon Sigma Kappa
ST. PETER, MN — Three of the campus’s four fraternities have announced today that they will merge with each other to form one single fraternity that members are now calling the “Super […]
Death Hill to be Transformed into Cliff for Midsommar Festival
ST. PETER, MN — If there is one thing every student knows about Gustavus, it’s that this school holds a strong sense of Swedish nationalism and is proud of its roots and […]
The Fourth Crown 